When I met you, I knew. I am timid, I don’t go outside of my comfort zone much. But I was pulled to you. When we met in person, immediately I knew. I saw flashes of a stone I never thought much about before.. moonstone. I remember your lips moving. I remember you talking to me. I remember us being there. But above all, I mostly remember thinking about how beautiful you were. Your eyes and your brown. Your nose. And your lips. I felt like I knew you once before. Like we’ve walked side by side in another life somehow. Lustful feelings. I remember not wanting to leave and wanting to follow you wherever you go.
I remember the first time we ever kissed. I was shy. But when we kissed. Oh, my world became all about you. I felt like we moved on the same wavelength. Long. Slow. Sensual. Kisses. You kissed me the way I have always wanted to be kissed.
When we went to Atlanta. I remember loving hearing you talk driving up there. Just the sound. Your laugh. I die for your laughter. That’s why I try to make you laugh today. Being silly. I remember getting in the room, and just cuddling with you. I felt like all the shit relationships were coming to an end because here I am, being held the way I’ve always wanted to be held by someone. By you. Feeling at home and at peace. Oh, the love. I just remember your hands going down my body and the look in your eye. In a vulnerable moment, sharing our bodies. You touched me exactly how I’ve always longed to be touched. And that’s when I fell. The the way you sung to me… sitting in the car. The way I laid next to you as you slept, looking over your shoulder and back… I fell for you. Oh. I still did not want you to leave. I wanted to follow you whoever you go.
Today, I am afraid. I have lost you momentarily. These sweet memories have become jaded in a way.. but a reminder. The security I felt in you has been ripped and tested.. I lay next to you and admire your every movement, and feel deadly afraid to trust you again, all in the same motion. I have been filled with self doubt and worthiness. I cannot predict the future. I cannot make you tell me or show me what you want. But I still am in love you just like in the beginning. I still want to follow you wherever you go.
Our Love 